Eli Week 1: The n-Faced Creatures We Are

I’ve recently become aware of the different ways I act around different people. When I went to a summer camp in North Carolina, I met and talked to many new people as I normally would. Then I flew to visit my grandparents with my mom, and it felt like my brain completely recalibrated itself. I was finally able to be “myself” again, becoming more energetic, unfiltered, and probably changing in many more ways I don’t even realize, without worrying about how others perceived me.


Obviously, people act differently in different circumstances. A funeral and a wedding, for instance, or talking with a teacher versus a friend, each demand their own appropriate behaviors. Online articles such as this included similar explanations to my own, too. So, I attributed the differences in my behavior at the summer camp and at home to varying familiarity levels. However, I noticed differences in my language and communication even between people I’m similarly close to. It made me wonder, are these variances different aspects of my personality, or am I simply conforming to what I think would make people like me more?


I might be sarcastic with one person, and like to talk about badminton with another. I concluded that this is probably due to the personality and interests of the person I’m talking to. If my friend loves telling morbid jokes, then I would be comfortable telling morbid jokes too. If my friend enjoys badminton, our conversations would naturally gravitate toward badminton. I realized that interacting with different people can bring out different sides of my personality, even sides I didn’t know myself. Perhaps, rather than conforming, I am merely adapting to the situation and tapping into facets of my personality that already exist.


However, I also notice myself feeling compelled to act in certain ways to please others. In an extroverted friend group, I would try to be more talkative even about topics I’m not really interested in. There would be small but sure shifts in my humor, expressions, language, and mannerisms. At these moments, I can’t help but feel that my actions are closer to conformity than being a part of myself.


But while conformity seems to oppose authenticity, it also seems like a result of self-consciousness. The more self-conscious someone is, the more they might naturally attempt to conform to seem “normal” with others. Then, what does acting like “myself” even mean? The sarcastic me may not be any less authentic than the relaxed me at home. Perhaps I don’t have a “true” or even “main” personality, but the many different ways I present myself all contribute equally to a larger identity.


Regardless of the answer, this thought experiment showed me that everyone has very complex and multifaceted identities. Sometimes, I look around and wonder about all the different sides of ourselves we may present, true to the n-faced creatures we are.



https://medium.com/original-philosophy/why-our-personality-changes-around-different-people-a0866d250666

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Ellery Week 1 - Hella Californian

Image
“it’s hella hot,” I texted my friend. They responded, “yeah idk why. i thought it would be hella cold.” Hella. What a funny word. It reminds me of freshman year, when a teacher told me that using the word ‘hella’ was an instant, telltale sign that someone was from NorCal. To me, the word was just another word, and I didn’t feel any different from someone who never says ‘hella.’  This brought about the question, “Who do people think I am?” Not when I’m using professional diction to try and impress my AP Lang teacher, not when I’m speaking a mix of Chinese and English, Chinglish, to my parents, not when I’m trying to sound like a confident leader in a team huddle, but when I really spoke , without any filters. One could definitely tell I’m a teenager, especially when I talk with my friends, or giggle at the occasional 67 joke. However, this made me realize, the “filters” I thought I used also speak volumes about myself. Outside of being a teenager in California, I am a student with ...
Read more

Yumeng Week #1: Behind My Scenes

Image
“What do you do in the play?” My go-to answer is, “I’m in the running crew!” Very rarely, I’d say, “I’m AHSPA’s Assistant Props Master, and I help manage the running crew, props, and work closely with our Stage Managers and Director!”  Admittedly, sometimes when I tell people what I do in theater, they look uninterested. However, I do understand that when theater is brought up, what happens behind the scenes isn’t always something most people focus on. Consequently, it’s common for people to overlook what backstage crew does, but I still never felt the need to justify my position. To me, it’s always been clear that my role as AHSPA’s Assistant Props Master is a title that I love and cherish, and there hasn’t been a moment where I regretted spending my falls and springs in the theater.  I don’t believe that the small talk word limit or even a long, deep midnight conversation can ever fully measure the love I get to experience everyday in theater. The chaotic giggles we can’t co...
Read more