Vihaan Week #4 - Saltiness
Sometime last week I was doomscrolling, as most teenagers would find themselves after over 6 hours of school. I’ve seen many people’s feed consist of straight slop; mine differs in the sense that it features some intellectual content. As I continued my session, I came across this specific reel that immediately prompted me to think about my next week’s blog.
The TLDR of the reel is that the parts of you that some might consider flaws could be the very things that keep the wrong people out of your life. Your flaws are also a part of your identity, and erasing them simply to better assimilate into society destroys an essential part of you “making you worth knowing.”
I have witnessed this occurring everywhere, in high school especially. I see so many subtle instances of people trying to mold themselves into somebody they’re not solely to appeal to others that have a higher social standing.
I see a lot of this in my sister; as much as it pains me to admit, I feel for her.
One of the reasons I witness it often is because I can relate. I struggled to transition from that “awkward” phase into someone that has more self confidence. It prides me to say that I feel a lot more sure in myself, but that was not always the case– I had an extremely difficult time around when I was 13-14 years old.
What I didn’t understand then that I do now is that you shouldn’t have to limit your own nature simply to get along better with others that might not even appreciate your efforts. I’m not saying that I’m perfect– far from it– but I have learned that internalizing and accepting every part of yourself actually gives you more confidence and fosters more natural interactions than inhibiting the aspects that you inaccurately deem “flaws.”
I have made so many friends that I couldn’t see myself being without simply by being comfortable with every part of my character: badminton, my unyielding passion for it; guitar, my creative outlet; unreasonable pet peeves, such as when someone chews too loud; and my occasional FOMO when I see photos from Instagram that I wanted to be a part of. All of that makes me who I am; accepting that takes time, but it reveals so many doors that otherwise would have been hidden by doubt and alienation.
Ultimately, the reel made me think about the qualities that people might omit for fear of not being able to have meaningful relationships, as well as why those qualities might actually be beneficial in the long run. Perhaps the very reason that people are able to have these important interactions isn’t because they inherently amiable, exceptionally smart, or like everybody else. Maybe it’s because of the traits that make us slightly annoying, odd, or overly passionate– our “saltiness.”
Hello Vihaan! I am quite surprised that your feed possesses certain intellectual content. Not because I do not think you are intellectual, but because I am one of those people you mentioned with “straight slop,” I rarely ever get to see something as thought-provoking as the reel you added.
ReplyDeleteI can resonate deeply with the topic you chose about the tendency of people molding themselves into something that they are not. I went through something similar throughout middle school, where I was extremely outgoing and social. However, the only thing I could hear over my laughter and the clamor of my friends was the words of people who called me things like “annoying” or “too loud.” Thus, began a period of time where I would rather sit in discomfort than speak up about anything. Although I have embraced every part of my loud (and occasionally annoying) personality, like you said, it is hard not to spot on other people.
I am glad to hear that you found friends who you are fully comfortable being yourself and embracing every part of your character around. Everyone deserves a circle or small group that sees themselves for who they truly are. You are right in saying that no one is perfect, and that flaws are not something be to denied, but something to be embraced. Thankyou for sharing your experiences and the outlook that you have on personality! I am very glad to have become your friend this year, and like an anonymous source once said, “the most important ingredient in any kitchen is salt.”
Hello Vihaan! I really liked your blog and the idea that things we sometimes consider flaws can actually be the things that make us unique and help us form meaningful friendships. That reel you saw was really thought provoking. I never would have thought that it was possible to even get those reels with the horrendous feed that I have. I especially liked how you explained that we shouldn’t have to change ourselves just to fit in with people who might not appreciate us for who we really are. I feel like everyone is trying to fit in or be perceived a certain way. I know that there have been countless amounts of time when I’ve thought about how I came across to other people and whether I should change the way I talk, or the way I act around certain people and situations. Your blog reminded me that it’s important to be comfortable.
ReplyDeleteI also liked how you connected this idea to your own experiences, because it made your message feel more genuine and relatable. I think your point about accepting every part of your character is really important, since the people who truly appreciate you are going to value the things that make you different too. I do get that people act differently because of the way they want to carry themselves, but overall I do agree that sometimes, the things that we try to hide about ourselves actually make us worth knowing, just like the glorious reel showed us today. Because of these reasons I do believe your statement about how friends should always have that one perfect group where you have nothing to worry about and can be yourself. Now that I think about it, that ocean thing was also insane. The fact that the world was just somehow made so that people would not just take the water is so cool. Anyways, have a good one.
Hi Vihaan! Your blog is truly an inspiring one; I really love how you are empowering everyone to take pride in themselves, even if they have traits that other people may find undesirable. You’re undeniably right: both our positive traits as well as our flaws are significant parts of our identity, and we wouldn’t be the same without them. I relate to how you are constantly seeing people trying to conform to generally desired standards to fit in with the larger group—being overly self-conscious, trying to sound cool and following trends, and more. I’m sure that most of us have gone through this phase before; in the teenage years of constant change and development of our identities, it’s easy to fall into the rabbit hole of insecurity. However, our so-called “flaws” are just as important as our other traits, and they are what make us uniquely us. Like you said, we no one should have to “limit” their own identity for a happy social life.
ReplyDeleteI’m happy for you that you feel a lot more confident now! I believe one of the most important qualities of friends is for them to accept us as who we are, like the ones you have. Your last point especially resonated with me as well; truly, no one has to be perfect, and it’s the little nuances and perks in our identities that really helps us connect. Thank you for sharing your insight with us!
Hi Vihaan, I really liked the connection you made between embracing your flaws to your own experiences, especially when you mentioned struggling with confidence at 13-14 years old. Like you, I found myself very socially awkward at this age, to the point where I did not want to get up during class on a computer because it would bring acknowledgement of my existence to my classmates. As I grow older, however, I am able to reflect on these experiences and understand that almost everyone has gone through a stage like this throughout their life, a stage essential to the development of our character. I think that although these stages are uncomfortable and difficult, it is important to understand that we are shaped by both positive and negative experiences. Your post made me reflect on how many people change themselves to fit in, especially in a time like high school where it can sometimes feel like there is only one way to be accepted, a narrowing option for your personality. I wonder, however, how people can learn to distinguish the difference between accepting their flaws and recognizing habits that are in need of improving.
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